Warming them Inside and Out

Swim team and gymnastics overlap the setup and start of my five-week talk at the Spiritual Life Center. But there’s no problem to that—we have Mrs. Lana.  Mrs. Lana is a godsend, five-star grandma/great-grandma babysitter God sent from above to help my family’s life work. My kids love her, and she goes out of her way to make life easier for me.

It helps that my kids are independent and not clingy on me or my husband.  But we have structured our lives so they’re not at daycare much.  So my sons’ reaction to me sharing our plans for my first presentation day surprised me.

I walked the kids through our plans.  After school everyone would change into their swimming suit or gymnastics leo and get a snack.  Mrs. Lana would meet us at the house.  She would follow us to the swimming lesson.  I would help them get situated in their respective classes.  Then I would leave for my talk.  Mrs. Lana would be there to take Gianna two doors down to gymnastics and take the boys home.

Our five-year-old Benjamin’s forehead started to crinkle.  “You mean, you won’t be there when I’m done with swimming?”  Slight tears were beginning to pool.

“Benjamin, I will be there when you start your lesson.  Mrs.  Lana will be there when you get out of the pool.”

“But, I’ll be cold.”

“Mrs. Lana will have a towel  for you, Benjamin.”

“But it won’t be the same,” the tears pushed over his eyelid.  “Mrs. Lana doesn’t put the towel on the same way you do.”

Down the tears came.

My maternal ecstasy to hear the words of one of my offsprings pining for my tender care trumped the sadness I felt for my son’s emotional anguish over my planned absence.  While I nurture clients and even friends well, being gentle and tender with my kids and spouse has never been my strength: I’m more of the drill sergeant / high energy coach-type.

Even when my tenderness is awkward, it’s nice to know they actually do recognize the love I try to give.  Wanting my family to experience me and our home with warmth prompted me to get some help I will share in my next blog.

The Catholic Women’s Guide to Healthy Relationships Tip:  Pay attention to what your family feels is special and do more of it.